My new natural high...

My heart is beating a little bit faster than usual.  I feel a bit euphoric – singing pop songs with my kids at the tops of my lungs, smiling more, generally feeling cheery…and even a little bit giddy.  Let’s face it - I’m on a bit of a high!  The best part is that this is an all natural feeling; it’s one that I get when I’ve made a new friend.

Many women quickly discover once they’ve had their first child that time with friends often gets cut back dramatically.  Where before you may have been able to meet up for a casual lunch or dinner or a night of drinks and dancing at least once or twice a week, the demands of a newborn mean that those breaks take a back seat to the hectic schedule of a baby who eats, sleeps and poops…a lot!  And unfortunately, friendships can suffer.

I was recently reminded of the struggle that many of us go through with making and maintaining friendships as adults when talking to a great friend who is struggling with this right now.  My gorgeous friend had recently moved across country, away from all her friends and family, and almost immediately gave birth to her second son. 

She was just getting the feel for the new suburb they’d moved to – working out where all of the necessities are: grocery, café, parks, etc.  A fantastic benefit of living in Oz is that there are government sponsored wellness centers that organize groups for new or relocated mums.  She joined the local mum’s group just a few weeks before her second son arrived. 

Luckily, one of the things that could have negatively affected your older friendships can actually help you to form new ones!  As my friend in Oz did, meeting up with other new mums can be a wonderful outlet and opportunity to create lasting friendships.  The fact that these other ladies are going through similar experiences can help form en empathetic connection immediately.  Playgrounds are also a place where casual conversations are easily started – especially when the little ones compel introductions when they “make friends” with one another as they play together. 

And this is exactly the type of situation that got me feeling so fired up today. 

I’d taken my boys to a purpose built water fountain pad just off The Strip, the sun was beating down and temps were over 105°.  This particular play area is one of the best free spots in the area –surrounded by high-end shops and restaurants – and includes a mini-stage with curtains, multiple playhouses, a tree house, merry-go-round, slides and a full hedge maze. So, as my boys began to streak across the water pad, I sat down on a bench next to another mum trying to avoid the sprays of water coming from the bigger kid’s karate chopping the water as hard as they could.  Just as a particularly large splash landed on our laps, we glanced at each other and I said, “Well, so much for sitting on the sidelines to stay dry, huh?” and that was that.

Will our friendship progress past a few shared text messages and a playground meet up or two?  Who knows…and, really, I don’t mind.  The rush I get from the potential friendship and the first blush of finding someone who seems as interested in hearing my stories as I am to hear hers will get me through a lot.